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Posted

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

(OK in Texas)

 

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

 

3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

 

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

 

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

 

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

 

7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

 

8. I pay your salary!

 

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

 

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

 

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

 

12. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Posted

lol, heres a cop joke i heard...

 

guy was speeding and gets pulled over (simple senario eh)

 

cop: bla, blah, blah ...

cop: licence and registration and proof of insurace ...

driver: well ill have to reach in the glove compartment, but im afraid i jammed the gun in there and now its stuck and wont open...

cop: a gun???

cop talking to radio: creeezzz... backup, send backup on route 46... creeezzz

driver: do my tires look low?

cop: yes... GET OUT THE CAR! *woop!* *handcuffeded*

driver: oh [bleeped!], they do look low, its either the coke in the tires or that fat bastard in the trunk, i bet he bled all over the picaso painting i stole from the mall!

cop cars: weeeooooweeooooweeoooo

cop: this man has blah blahg balh

chief: check it out boys!

cop2: nothing in the trunk sir...

cop: tires!

cop2: tires are fine

cop: he has a gun in the glove compartment

cop2: all it has is his registration and proff of insurance and lisence sir.

driver: this guy is crazy!

chief: why did he say all this???

driver: i dont know, im surpried he didnt say i was speeding?

 

 

OMG sooooo funny!

Posted

yeah, but more realisticly, a cop would not stall, he would act faster if you told him you had a gun and there would be way more ways to find if you were working your way out of it when the cheif actually discusses it.

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